:: Da' Militant One's Lair ::

:: Sunday, May 02, 2004 ::

Victory in Fallujah

The Iraqi insurgents and terrorists celebrated a victory today when the Bush Administration ordered marines to withdrawal from Fallujah. The proud marines were forced to stand down as the casuality rate is too high and is starting to interfere with Bush's reelection campaign. A senior admnistration official stated that "one or two soldiers dying each week is better for our re-election efforts. Besides we only wanted the oil fields anyway." The Iraqi insurgents and terrorists say that their great victory is made greater by the fact that with Saddam gone they now have no one to keep them in check. They laughed and said that while they knew that Saddam was keeping a lid on a hornet's nest, they hoped to convince the world that he was an "evil doer", a "bad man", and a "brutal dictator". They all proceeded to shout "Mission Accomplished".

Back in the White House George W. Bush took a nap while Dick Cheney fielded questions.

Question: Where is the president?

Cheney: He is taking his afternoon nap.

Question: Shouldn't he be answering these questions?

Cheney: Heh, heh, heh. Look little Georgie had a rough day. They pre-empted the Bugs Bunny Roadrunner Hour this morning and we were all out of Bosco.

Question: Wow, that does sound like a rough morning.

At that moment, the president walked into the room rubbing his eyes and crying that the loud voices woke him up. Vice President Cheney preceded to give the President a glass of warm milk, burbed him and sent him back to bed. The President began to cry and Cheney read him his favorite bedtime story, "Curious George". The President finally fell asleep and Cheney asked us to lower our voices

Cheney: I only have time for a few questions.

Question: Why did we withdraw from Fallujah?

Cheney: We did not withdraw, we redistributed our forces.

Question: But the Iraqi insurgents and terrorist elements are calling this a major defeat for the U.S. and a victory for terrorism.

Cheney: Listen, no one is more committed to fighting terrorism than this president. That show off John Kerry would have terrorists running his foreign policy.

Question: Then why give up on Fallujah?

Cheney: We haven't. As we speak we have one of Saddam's former generals leading an all-Iraqi battalion in Fallujah.

Question: A former general of Saddam's?

Cheney: You betcha'.

Question: Wasn't one of the objectives of the war to rid Iraq of Saddam and his military apparatus?

Cheney: Of, course.

Question: Then why is the general being permitted to lead troops.

Cheney: Have you seen those Iraqi insurgents and terrorists? They're mean guys. They keep shooting at us.

Question: Well, Sir, this is a war and we are shooting at them.

Cheney: Yeah, but they were supposed to welcome us with open arms.

Question: What happened?

Cheney: They didn't get the memo.

Question: What is the strategy now?

Cheney: No further questions.


Email address is: militant.one@att.net
I read all responses. I will post responses along with my reply. Watch raw language. Remember Michael Powell runs the FCC.

:: DM1 5/02/2004 11:10:00 AM [+] ::
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